I’ve come across people online, and offline, who do not like Taylor Swift. If it was merely a taste-thing, I wouldn’t have batted an eye-lid. However, it has to do with something much bigger – the fact that she “overshares.”

For starters, I think the term “overshare” is incorrectly used in this context. Songwriting is a tool that is most effective when you pour your emotions into it. The more emotional and raw a song is, the better it is, lyrically. Look at Queen’s music for instance. Their iconicity stems from the fact that their lyrics are emotionally-charged. Obviously, Queen’s and Taylor Swift’s art is not the same (please don’t come for me, thank you). However, in this age of shallow, repetitive pop, when music is rarely NOT about partying, sex, drugs, or butts, Taylor’s music and lyrics stand in stark contrast. Songwriting itself is a cathartic process – and I know this, personally. Taylor herself discusses this as well:

https://www.instagram.com/p/BhQ7_j9Dlnl/?hl=en&taken-by=taylenareputation

In a Forbes magazine article, Amy Morin discusses the differences between oversharing and being authentic. She says that authenticity is about being “brave enough to be yourself and genuine enough to live according to your values” – not about sharing the gritty details of your deepest, darkest secrets with the world. Despite people saying she shares everything about her breakups, Taylor has never explicitly mentioned who inspired her songs. It is always the media and people who try to figure out her narratives. Additionally, she began songwriting at 12, and that age, our feelings are bound to seem dramatic. A song is, after all, an exploration of an emotion someone goes through at a certain point in time. That moment now lives on forever as it has been reiterated in a song.

Which brings me to my next point: why is there a culture of being against sharing our vulnerabilities and emotions? As humans, we go through a rollercoaster of emotions every day. And sometimes we may feel the same thing over and over again. (In other news, water is wet.) So, if it’s something that is natural, why look down on it? Even in Justin Baldoni’s Ted Talk, he discusses how it is a huge taboo for men to display any vulnerability. There is always an expectation to be “Man Enough.” Women are stereotyped as being sensitive, but when they are actually being vulnerable, they are punished for it. Men are stereotyped as being “manly” because of their lack of emotions. So when they are being vulnerable, they are punished for it. One is accused of “fitting in” to their stereotype, and one is accused of not adhering to it. Frankly, this is unfair.

Maybe it’s time to leave all this shaming behind. Everyone processes their inner thoughts and turmoils differently through mediums that make sense to them be it art, songwriting or simply talking about it with someone. As long as people are not hurting others (e.g. physical assault, verbal abuse) when sharing their emotions and feelings then we all should either be supportive or simply choose to ignore as is our right. By responding negatively to someone sharing their sentiments, aren’t we sort of being hypocritical –  because isn’t sharing our reservations about someone else’s openness a form of being emotive, too? How come we are allowed to do that, but not others? What does it really mean to our personal identity when someone else shares their emotions?

At the end of it all, sharing your feelings is a sign of strength, because you’re putting out your unguarded response into a world where you know there’s a chance you’ll be deserted, looked down on or slandered for it. It is something to be respected for, more than anything else.

Nethmie Dehigama

Header Image: Rolling Stone